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Seinfeld

4���� ���ΰ� (�·κ���) Cosmo Kramer, Elaine Bennice,
George Costanza, Jerry Seinfeld

���İ��� ���� �������� ���η� ���� ��Ʈ���Դϴ�. �� ������ ������ ���������� ��ġ�ִ� ���� ����� �ʿ��ϴ� ���������� ���� �ڸ޵��� �б� �Դϳ�.
������ �ϸ鼭 ������ �κп� ���� ���� ��å�� �ٶ��, Ʋ�ȴ���� �Ʒ����� �Ѱ��ֽñ�... ^^;;

The Chinese Woman
(����: �߱�����)

[JERRY and ELAINE walking down the street. ELAINE is carrying two plastic grocery bags and one big paper grocery bag. JERRY is carrying none and is pretending to not notice the discrepancy.]
������ ������ �Ÿ��� �Բ� ���� �ִ�. ������ 2���� ��� �ķ�ǰ������ 1���� Ŀ�ٶ� �ķ�ǰ ���� ������ ��� ����. ������ ������� ���鼭�� �� ô �ܸ��Ѵ�

JERRY
Good shave today..
���� �鵵�� �ߵƾ�..

ELAINE
[wry/sarcastic] Don't worry, Jerry, I can manage these bags; really I'm fine.
[�񲿸鼭] ������ ����, �� ȥ�ڼ��� �� �������� ���� ���� �ִٰ�. �� ���� �I����

JERRY
I'm thinkin' of lettin' my sideburns grow in a little..
���� ���� ������ ���� �⸦�� ���� ������
 

ELAINE
Can we rest here a second.
���⼭ ��� ����?

JERRY
[pause] Yeah, I guess.
[�ӹ��Ÿ���]�׷�.�׷��� ��

[She sits on the stairs of a small entryway.]

JERRY
.. So how's Noreen?
�׷�, �븰�� ��� ������?

ELAINE
Mm! She's got a new boyfriend: Paul.
��. �� ����ģ���� ������.���̶��.

JERRY
Already? That was fast.. I assume he's not a High Talker..
����. �������� ������. �� ����ģ���� ��Ҹ� ���� ���� ����� �ƴϰ���.

ELAINE
No, but, he has, The Worst Habit. Whenever he answers the phone, he won't put Noreen right on. Ya haveta go through, like, ten minutes of chit-chat.
��. �׷����� �״� ���� ���� ������ ������ ����. ��ȭ�� ���� ������ �븰���� �ٷ� �ٲ� �ַ����� �ʾ�. �ڱ��ϰ� �� 10�� �̾߱��ؾ� �� ��.

JERRY
A Long Talker.
�������� ��

ELAINE
Yeah! But he is so boring! But now, whenever he answers the phone: I just hang up.
�¾�.�״� ��¥ ������.�׷��� ������ �װ� ��ȭ ������ �׳� �ٷ� ���������.

JERRY
[pause] All right; let's move it out.
[����ִ�] �� ���� ���� ������

[ELAINE gets her bags.]
[������ �ڱ� ������ ���� ���]

JERRY
Hey, isn't that George's father?
,�� �� ��� ���� �ƹ��� �Ƴ�?

ELAINE
Oh, yeah, it is! Should we say hello?
��! �¾�. �λ縦 �ؾ� �ұ�?

JERRY
I've never seen him in Manhattan before; it's weird. So out of context.
���� ����ư���� ������ �����µ�..�̻��ϱ�.�յڰ� ���� �ʾ�

ELAINE
That man he's with: is he wearing a cape?
�Բ� �ִ� �� ����, ���並 �԰� ���� �ʾ�?

JERRY
I believe he is wearing a cape.
�� �׷���..

ELAINE
Why is Mr. Costanza with a man in a cape?
�� �ڽ�ź�ھ��� ���並 ���� ����� �Բ� ����?

JERRY
Well, it is good cape weather. Cool. Breezy.
�۽�, ������ �����̶� �ΰ� .�ÿ��ϰ� �ٶ��� �ּ� �Ұ�.

ELAINE
Yeah, why a cape? Who wears a cape? Where do you even get a cape?
�׷�. �ٵ� �� ���� ������? �������並 �԰� �ٴѴٰ�. ���� ���並 ��� ���� �� ����?

JERRY
You're right; it is strange. In fact, let's cross to the other side of the street. Cover me.
�¾�. �̻��ϱ�. ��� �׷�.�ٸ� �� ��� �dz� ����. �� �� ������.

[ELAINE positions the bags to cover her face and upper body. JERRY walks by her so he's out of view, too.]
������ ������ �󱼰� ��ü�� ���߰�, ������ ���� ���� ��¦ �پ� ���� ���߰� �ȴ´�

[Commercial Break]
�߰� ����

[JERRY and ELAINE arrive at JERRY's "house."]
������ ������ ���� ���� �����Ѵ�

JERRY
Just, ah, plop it on the counter there.
���� ���̽�Ź�� ���� ��. 

[ELAINE drops one bag deliberately and throws the others on the counter. He hadn't helped her at all on the way--payback time. Then, during the following, she spends a lot of time looking for food in the bags and puts some in one bag--presumably hers.]
������ ���� �ϳ��� ������ ���� ���� , �������� ��Ź�� �������´�. ������ ���� ���� �� ������ ���� ������� �ʾҴ�.-- ������ �ð�--�̾� ������ ������ �ӿ� �ִ� �ķ�ǰ�� õõ�� ã�ƺ��� ���� �ڱ� ��ó�� �ķ�ǰ �� ���� �����ϳ��� ��´�.

JERRY
Oh! I got a message. [presses button on phone machine]
�޼����� ���ֳ�[��ȭ���� ��ư�� ������]

GEORGE
[on tape] Hey, it's George. I got nothin' to say.. [beeeep]
[��ȭ����] �ȳ�. �������ε� �� ���� ����...[��..]

ELAINE
That sounds Urgent..
��, ���� ���� �� ������..

JERRY
Let me call him back..
Hello?? Who is this?
Donna Chang? Oh, I'm sorry, I must o' dialed the wrong number.
��ȭ�� ���߰ڱ�. ��������. ��������? ���� ���̶� ����? ��, �̾��մϴ�. ��ȣ�� �߸� ���� �� ������.

ELAINE
Donna Chang?
���� ���̶��?

JERRY
[is rivalling] Should've talked to her; I love Chinese women.
[�ٽ� ��ȭ ��ȣ�� ������] ���̳� �ɾ�þ�� �ߴµ�..�� �߱����ڸ� �����ϰŵ�.

ELAINE
Isn't that a little racist?
�ణ ���� �������� �߾� �Ƴ�?

JERRY
If I like their race, how can that be racist?..
Hellooo??..
�� ������ �����Ѵٴ°� ���� ���������̳�? ��������...

Oh, is this Donna Chang again?!..
Yyy-yes, I am calling George..
Oh, the lines are crossed; you're getting his calls. Well, what do you  know?!
��, �� ���� ���̶� ����? ��..��, ���������� �ϴ� ��ȭ�ε���. �̷� ȥ���̱���. ��ȭ�� ������� ���׿�. ��, ������ ����?

[KRAMER comes in. He's got a bottle of water. JERRY stays on the line to chat with Donna.]
ũ���Ӱ� ���´�. ���̵� ���� ���� �ִ�. ������ ������ ����ϱ� ���� ��ȭ�� ���� �ʰ� �ִ�.

JERRY
So listen..
��, ����

KRAMER
I'm goin' through this stuff like water.. [to JERRY] Who you talkin' to?
�� �� ���� ��ó�� ����� �� �ִٰ�.[��������]���� �����ϱ� ��ȭ���̾�?

ELAINE
He's on with a Chinese woman.
�߱����� �ϱ���

KRAMER
Oooo, ooooo. You know, I dig Asian women. [a little distracted, pulling down his underwear in back, through his pants]
��..��..�˰� �־�? �� �ƽþ� ���ڸ� ������. [�ణ ��û�� ��, �������� ������ ��Ƽ�� �Ʒ��� ������]

ELAINE
You got a.. comfort problem there?
�� ������ �� �־�?

KRAMER
Yeah, I think these Jockeys shrunk.
�� �ﰢ ��Ƽ�� �پ����� ��.

ELAINE
I thought you wore silk underwear.
��� ��Ƽ�� �Ծ��� �� �˾Ҵµ�
 

KRAMER
No. Well, you know, I wore 'em for about a month but I couldn't stay with it. Yeah, I need the secure packaging of Jockeys. [he's serious. Then he makes a hand gesture of grabbing up.] My boys need a house.
�ƴ�. ��. �˴ٽ��� �Ѵް� ��� ��Ƽ�� �Ծ��µ� ������ �״�� ���� ���� �������.�׷� ���� ���� �ﰢ ��Ƽ�� ����� �־�� ��[������ ǥ��. �׸��� ���� ������ ���� ��� �ô��� �Ѵ�]
�̰͵��� ���� �־�� �Ѵٰ�.

ELAINE
[not charmed..] That's nice.
Listen, Kramer, you know, if you ever want to have kids you shouldn't wear briefs. Boxers are much better for your sperm count.
[����ġ �ʾ��ϸ�] �װ� �ٻ��ϱ�. �ߵ� ��� ũ���̸�,���� �װ� ���� ���̸� ���Ѵٸ� �ﰢ��Ƽ�� ������. �簢 ��Ƽ�� �Ծ�� ���ڰ� ���� �ʾ�.

KRAMER
Sperm count?
Well how many ssssperm should I have?
���ڼ��� ���� �ʴ´ٰ�. �׷� �󸶸�ŭ�� ���ڰ� �־�� �ϴµ�?

ELAINE
A lot.
�� ����

[JERRY comes back. He'd wandered into the bedroom and is now off the phone.]
������ �ٽ� ���´�. ħ���� ����Ÿ��� ��ȭ�� ���´�.

JERRY
I got a date!
����Ʈ ����� �߾�

ELAINE
With the Chinese woman?!
�� �߱������ϰ�?

JERRY
She knew who I was! She saw me in a club one time! My first date ever with the Pacific Rim. I'm very excited.
���� �������� �˴����. �ѹ� ���� Ŭ������ ���ҵ�. ȯ������ ������ �����ϰ��� ó���� ����Ʈ��. ��еdz�.

KRAMER
Jerry. Did ya ever have your sperm count checked?
����. �� ���ڼ��� üũ�� ������ �ִ�

JERRY
No, why should I? I wear boxers.
�ƴ�. �� �׷��� ����? �� �簢 ��Ƽ�� �Ծ�

KRAMER
You ever get a woman pregnant?
�� ���� �ӽŽ�Ų �� �־�?

JERRY
I'm sorry, Kramer. Those records are permanently sealed..
�̾� ũ����. �׷� ����� ������ �Ա��ؾ�...

KRAMER
What would you say if I told you, "I never impregnated a woman"?
���� ���� �ʿ��� ���� ���ڸ� �ӽŽ�Ų ���� ���� ���ٰ� ���Ѵٸ�?

JERRY
Really? You never slipped one past the goalie in all these years??.. Boy, I'm surprised. You've slept with a lot of women, I--
��¥? ���� ���Ⱓ ���� �񹮿� ���� ���� ���� ������? �� ��� �� �� ���� �����ϰ� ���� ���ݾ�. ����..

KRAMER
A lot of 'em! [wild gesture, freaked out]
Do you think maybe I'm.. Depleted??!!
��ô ����[ũ�� ������ �ϸ�, ����Ѵ�.] �ʴ� ���� �Ƹ�..���� �����ٰ�...
 

JERRY
Well, I'm sure you're not.. Totally Depleted.
�� �������� �Ƹ��� ������ ���� �����ٰ� ���������� ����.

KRAMER
Well, but what if I am? I'm the last male Kramer! We're facing extinction!
��. �ٵ� ���� �׷��ٸ� ��¼��. ���� ũ���̸� ������ ������ �Ƶ��� ���ݾ�. �츮 ������ ������ �����ϴ� �Ŷ��.

JERRY
Well, go to a fertility clinic. Have your sperm count checked.
��. ���� ũ���п� ���� ���ڼ� �˻縦 �� ��.

KRAMER
Yeah, but then I'd have to.. well, you know.. into a cup? In the middle of the day??
��. �ٵ� �׷��� �Ѵٸ�, ����..�� ���ݾ�..�� �ӿ�..? �װ͵� �볷��..

ELAINE
Does that conflict with your regular schedule?
��? ���� �ϴ� �ð��� Ʋ���� �׷�?

[KRAMER, distracted, leaves.]
[ũ����. ��¿ �� �𸣴� ������]

ELAINE
[going to the phone, she's been eating chips from small package of them] All right. I'm gonna try Noreen again.
[���׸� ���ڿ��� ��� ����Ĩ�� ���� ������ ��ȭ��� ����] ����. �븰���� �ٽ� ��ȭ �غ�����.

JERRY
I am very excited about this date! We're goin' to Hunan Balcony!
�̹� ����Ʈ�� �������� ����� ��. �ij� ���ڴ� �Ĵ翡 ���ٰ�!

ELAINE
She's Chinese so you suggest Chinese food?
�� ���ڰ� �߱����̶� �߱��Ĵ翡 ���ڰ� ����?

JERRY
She suggested it!
�� ���ڰ� ���ڰ� �߾�!

ELAINE
I thought Chinese don't eat Chinese..
�� �߱����� �߱��������� �ܽ����� �ʴ°ɷ� �����ߴµ�..

JERRY
She's very assimilated.
�׳�� ��ȭ�� �ߵŴ� ��������.

[ELAINE's on the phone--we hear a male, "Hello?" on the other end. ELAINE quickly hangs up.]
[������ ��ȭ�� �ϰ� �ִ�. ��� ��ȭ�⿡�� "��������"��� ���� ��Ҹ��� �鸰��. ������ �� ��ȭ�⸦ �������´�]

JERRY
Paul again?
�� ���� �޾�?

ELAINE
You can't get one ring past him.
�״� ��ȭ���� �� �� �︮�⵵ ���� �޾�.
 

[GEORGE comes in.]
[���� ����]

GEORGE
Hey, hey, hey! You don't call me back?!
�̺�, �̺� ! ���ѵ� ��ȭ ������.

JERRY
I tried! Your line's crossed with a Chinese woman!
�ߴٰ�, �ٵ� �� �߱� ���ڶ� ȥ���� ����

GEORGE
Uh?
�׷�?

ELAINE
[coming toward GEORGE to sit over by JERRY, who's on the arm of the couch. GEORGE is standing.]
Hey, George, we saw your father on the street before.
[���Ŀ� �ɾ� �ִ� ���� ������ ������ ������ ������ �ٰ�����. �������� ���ִ�] ������, ���� �ó����� ���� �ƹ����� �ôµ�.

GEORGE
What's he doin' in the city today?
���� �ó����� ��¾ �Ϸ� ��������?

[They both shrug.]
[�Ѵ� ����� ���� �Ѵ�]

GEORGE
You didn't ask him?
�� �����̳İ� �츮 �ƹ������� ���� �ʾҾ�?

[They both shake heads no. ELAINE's eating chips.]
[������ �¿�� ������ ���ߴٰ� �Ѵ�. ������ ����Ĩ�� �԰� �ִ�]

GEORGE
You didn't say hello?
�ƴ�ü�� ���ߴ� ������?

ELAINE
Well, he was with someone. A man.. In a cape.
� ����ϰ� ���� ��ô����. ���並 ���� � �����ϰ�..

GEORGE
Why was he wearing a cape?..
�� �װ� ���並 �԰� ������?

[ELAINE and JERRY shrug.]
[���ΰ� ������ ����� �����Ÿ���}

GEORGE
Was my father wearing a cape?
�츮 �ƹ����� ���並 �԰� �־���?

JERRY
No. Jacket and tie: no cape.
�ƴ�.�纹�� ��Ÿ�������̼���.����� ���� �����̾�

GEORGE
Huh.. Cape.. [turns, slowly goes to door] W--a man with a cape doin' with my father?..What was my father doing with a man in a cape? ..[opens door] Why a cape? [out the door and gone]
��. �����..[�� ������ õõ�� ����] ���並 ���� ���ڰ� �츮 �ƹ����ϰ� ������ ������?..�츮 �ƹ����� ���並 ���� �����ϰ� ������ ������?[���� ����]�� ���並 �Ծ���?[������ �������]

[Fertility clinic. In an examination room. KRAMER's waiting. The DOCTOR comes in.]
[����Ŭ����. �˻��. ũ���Ӵ� ��ٸ���. �ǻ簡 ���´�]

DOCTOR
The results of your sperm test are in.
Well, ummm.. Are you planning to start a family?
���� �˻� ����� ���Ծ��. ��, ���̸� ���� ��ȹ�ΰ���?

KRAMER
Yes! I would like to! Very much!..
Well, I'm low, now, aren't I? I ca--I can feel it!...
��! ���� �;��. �����ؿ�!. �ٵ�, ���� ���ڼ��� �ʹ� ���� �ʳ���. �� �׷� �� ���� ������ ����.

DOCTOR
Yes, I'm afraid you're a little low.
��. �̾��մϴٸ� ���� ��ġ�� ������

KRAMER
Ohhh. Man!! It's over! The Kramer name is finished! I'm never goin' to procreate! I--
��...�̷�! ������!. ũ���� ���ȵ� ���� �����̾�! �븦 �մ� ���� �����̶� ���̾�. ����--

DOCTOR
Hey--that's not necessarily true. There are measures you can take to improve your fertility.
�̺���-- �� �׷� �͸��� �ƴϿ���. ���ڼ��� �ø� �� �ִ� ����� ���� ���� �־��.

KRAMER
All right, all right. What. What. You tell me; I'll do anything. Come on, Doc, tell me.
��, ��, ���� ����, ��� ���� ����. �������. ������ �� �Ҳ���, �ڻ�� �� ����� ���� �޶� ���̿���.

DOCTOR
First thing: you should wear boxer shorts.
���� �� ���� �簢 ��Ƽ�� �Դ°� ���ٴ� �̴ϴ�.

KRAMER
All the time?
��������?

DOCTOR
All the time. Ya have to get off Jockeys right away.
��, ��������.�����̶� ���� �ﰢ��Ƽ�� ���� ������ �մϴ�.

KRAMER
Yeah, but I've always worn Jockeys.
��. ������ �� �׻� �ﰢ��Ƽ ���� �Ծ��µ���.

  2���� �̾��� 

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